Resilient Couples Do These Key Things When Times Are Tough

How is your relationship? Is your connection cracking under the weight of external pressures or internal stressors? You aren’t alone.

These are challenging times and challenging times are tough on any couple. What strains your relationship? Job transition, parenthood, financial strain, loss, even political disagreement? These situations and more have the potential to do lasting damage to your connection. Securing the tools you need to weather your difficulties is crucial.

Healthy couples can survive, even thrive, in tough times. It’s important to boost your ability to love well and connect deeply. Focus on the following strategies to get along, get your needs met, and get closer- whatever life throws your way.

How You & Your Partner Can Cope During Difficult Times

  • Set Clear Intentions

Commitment is everything in a lasting relationship. You and your partner will do well to be clear about your dedication to each other and solidify your relationship goals. To be clear, this doesn't start with the other person. Self-awareness and self-acceptance help pave the way for healthy intentions. 

Tough times aren’t nearly as damaging if you know yourself well and can express yourself effectively. With your values and desires clear, you can more effectively move forward, bringing less anxiety and a growth mindset to the relationship table.

close view of two hands held
  • Prioritize Your Partnership

Resilient couples honor the idea that they are doing life together. Alleviate stress, anxiety, and tension with these team-oriented practices:

  • Schedule time together. Put specific, uninterrupted time for connection and communication on the calendar.

  • Authentically appreciate each other. Look for your partner’s growth and talk up their strengths.  Be sure to point out the good in each other.

  • Keep touching. Don’t surrender casual touch, kisses, hugs, or intimacy. They bring significant comfort and reinforce your bond.

  • Factor in the fun. It’s easy to focus so intently on problems that life becomes one-dimensional and humorless. Find ways to laugh and lighten up. Try to keep things fresh and novel.

  • Offer each other routine respite. Sometimes you're both served by time alone. Put your partnership first by allowing for guilt-free time away. Honor your mutual need to pursue interests and hobbies on your own.

  • Allow for Flexibility

Perspective matters when times are hard. Healthy couples survive the worst of times when they accept that life and relationships exist on a continuum. If you believe happy relationships don’t ebb and flow in response to difficulty, a downward spiral in life can cause you to lose sight of each other.

Try to go easy on each other. Stay open-minded to the changes life brings, check in with each other, and review what matters to you. Flexibility and compromise foster hope and keep moving forward together possible.

  • Communicate with Empathy & Respect

Do your best to handle dark days in your relationship with dignity, respect, and a willingness to compromise. Fairness and support facilitate growth and deepen your bond. It is important not to project negative feelings onto each other. Instead, connect on an emotional level with your partner. The object is not to fix or minimize. The goal is to be present and responsive.

Empathy and compassion go a long way when managing uncertainty and disappointment. Approaching each other this way leads to less lashing out in anger. Navigating difficulty is helped by giving each other grace and the benefit of the doubt. 

If nothing else, ask questions, listen well, and share what you're experiencing. Try not to avoid each other or place blame. Remaining engaged and vulnerable protects the emotional safety between you. This can be extremely validating and communicates a willingness to put your relationship first.

Take The Next Step

Finally, when life is hard and your relationship is rocky, it’s perfectly normal to feel frustrated with each other. Fortunately, you don’t have to tough it out on your own. There is no shame in seeking help and accepting guidance. You can stop your mutual suffering with support from a professional counselor. 

I am experienced and qualified to help. You and your partner learn new ways to interpret relationship signals and emotional cues. Soon you’ll find that greater empathy, compassion, and emotional awareness smooth the path forward.

When you and your partner are ready, learn more about the benefits of therapy. Please read more about couples counseling and reach out for a consultation soon. Let’s talk soon.